Wednesday, January 13, 2010
You Bitch! (Pardon Our English: Part Two)
Having blamed my children's swearing on the kindergarten, I am understandably sensitive when they DO, in fact, break out with inappropriate English words.
So that I immediately felt guilty the morning, a few weeks ago, when Aidan greeted me, happily, with a cheerful "You bitch!". He was sitting on the couch and showed no animosity towards me as I entered the room. So then why the hostility? And where the heck did he pick up THAT particular turn of phrase. I'll admit, there are others, but I honestly don't recall using that one at all. "You bitch?"
It took only a few minutes of frantic pantomime, and finally a trip into the kitchen, for Aidan to show me that what he was looking for were the Nougat Bits, his chocolatey choice of breakfast cereal at the moment. Oh! NOUGAT BITS! What a relief.
So it was cause for consternation yesterday when he clambered onto my lap once again calling me a bitch. I mean, who talks to their mother that way?! And he was clear this time, pointing to me, slowly saying YOU and then repeating BITCH over and over and over. There was clearly something he wanted me to do, but calling me names certainly wasn't helping me to do it any faster.
Turns out he wanted me to build a bridge with my legs. So that he could crawl over the BRIDGE, ie my legs, from the footstool onto the chair and my lap. (The chair having ostensibly turned into a fighter pilot or a fire engine.) You. Bridge.
#%@*$& it! Am I ever going to understand these kids?!