Wear a hat, walk briskly but don't run, do not be threatening, they are only defending their nests, the poor buggers.
|Hawaiian Birds! Aidan and Matthe with Sophia and Luca|
Cleanse the affected area thoroughly with soap and water. The area behind your left ear that's bleeding after the above advice did no good at all.
Another good strategy is to send the kids ahead on their bikes. Although I think Matthew has cottoned on to that one!
If all else fails, avoid the area until the end of the nesting season in a few months. The area the magpie lives in, this time. After all, we are in his territory, he has the right to be there.
|At the Gallery for Modern Art in Brisbane. Indigenous Australian exhibit.|
You know you are playing baseball in Australia when right field is closed off because two particularly aggressive plovers have decided to defend their nest out there.
"Take a single, mate....we'll get the balls back at the end of the nesting season."
Large men with bats versus two tiny birds with stilts for legs.
|Cousin Ella feeding the rainbow lorikeets at Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary|
To be fair, the men aren't allowed to use the bats on the birds.
You know your children are growing up Australian when they look up to see where all the noise is coming from and go, oh, it's just the birds. (You know they are growing up multiculturally because they are playing Australian Rules Football with an American football!)
Yeah, an entire flock of cockatoos, carreening majestically through the cloudless sky, skimming palm trees and eucalypts.
|Sorry mate, ask all you want, but Aidan ain't sharing!|
You people are so spoiled.
You know that man on South Bank is a tourist because he is avidly taking shots of an ibis. Ancient Egypt, Greece and Biblical references aside, in Oz the bird is as common - and as venerated - as the pigeon.
You will secretly admire the ibis yourself, but tell noone.
|Brian in his natural habitat, behind a camera.|
You know you are lucky to be living in a place where you have to stop for breeding pairs of Asian ducks crossing the road on your way home. (Honestly, mate, these birds aren't very bright. But I haven't hit one yet.)
You spotted a kangaroo only 1 km from your home last Thursday morning on the way home from the gym.
|Sophia and friend at Lone Pine Koala Sanctuary|
You still stop in timeless admiration when you see a koala in a tree above you.
And you still smile when the kookaburras wake you up at dawn.
Australia is for the birds, mates. And you, strange bird, are so lucky to be here!